A positive mind contributes greatly to a healthy body, happy relationships, being successful in your job and studies. It contributes to basically everything. Let me first explain what a mindset is; Mindset means that you literally set your mind in a good position instead of letting it wander wherever it wants to go. This can take different forms. For example; you hate but I mean, you really hate Mondays. From start to end all your Mondays are awful. On Sunday, you start to feel a little depressed about the day that is coming and as soon as your alarm goes off on Monday morning you just want to burst into tears, cause the horrible day has come again. And guess what, it never fails to be horrible.
This all happens in your mind and you can change it by deciding to shift your mind and make Monday a great day. You program yourself to think that this is the beginning of a new week full of new chances and opportunities. You start to plan activities that you enjoy and you focus on all the things that go well. And with this mindset your Monday will never fail to be great.
Sounds easy, right? It can be ?
In an earlier blog I told you that, in general we think a lot of negative thoughts every day and it has a great impact on how we feel and as a result, on how we behave. Long story short, negative thoughts impact our life in a negative way. And so we want to start to think positive. This requires some true effort. As I explained in the last blog, the first step is to become aware of your negative thoughts. Awareness immediately creates distance between yourself and the thought and thereby diminishes the power of the thought. Now how do you go from a head full of negative thoughts to a head full of positive thoughts. Some golden rules.
Is this thought bringing me closer to where I want to be in my life?
This is the Number 1 golden rule whenever you are training your mind to work for you instead of work against you. Whenever a thought pops up, ask yourself the question above. Is the answer no? Then you don’t need to think the thought. Like with the Monday example, this doesn’t take you forward in any way. It just slows you down from wherever you aspire to be. This is a sign that you want to let go of that thought and pick one that is more positive.
What you resist, persist
Once you have identified some of your negative thoughts, you might think; I can’t think that again and you try to push the thoughts away. Unfortunately, it hardly works, the power of the thought may even increase. I think all of us have tried the ‘’Don’t think about a really big green monster riding little pink bycle’’. Just doesn’t work. The thought could even become intrusive. You need to know that thoughts are habits of your brain and you can’t just turn them off. So, what càn you do?
Clouds above your head
So instead you observe the thought, as if it is a cloud above your head. As you observe the thought you have opportunity to reveal its true identity. What I mean is, see the thought for what it is > A negative thought that doesn’t serve you in anyway. For example, your boss just looked at you in a serious way and you think; ‘I knew he doesn’t like me, I didn’t do that project very well, he might fire me’. Instead of letting that thought make you really miserable, insecure and maybe even afraid of your boss, look at the thought and say; hmm my brain gives me this fearful message, I don’t need it and I will let it drift over. And remember behind the clouds, the sun shines!
It’s NOT YOU!
Thoughts feel so real that we tend to think that it is a part of who we are and that because you think it, it is true. For example, because you think that Mondays are awful, it is true. Because you think your hips are wide, it is true. Because you think that you can’t do that job, it is true. Because you think that situation is your fault, it is true. But here is the news; You are not your thoughts, you are much more than that. The ability to think is a fantastic tool that you can apply to do all kinds pf things, but it is not you. That is why you need to be critical with your thoughts and keep asking the question; does this thought serve me, yes or no?
Negative thoughts are not going to let you go you have to let them go
I mention it all the time, our brain was designed to survive. It means that it gets super alert whenever you experience stress or anxiety. It wants to protect you from situations where your life is at risk. As a result, your mind wants to find a solution by ruminating, it wants you to go over all the possible future risks, it wants you to imagine the worst case scenario. And then it will jump to the next fearful thought, and start to think about that. Your mind, once started to ruminate is not going to stop by itself. You need to direct it to a more positive thought.
Fill your head with positive thoughts
When you start to fill your head with positive thoughts, the power of the negative thoughts diminishes. Your mind is forever going to like to focus on negative things so it’s a daily practice. Good luck!